Thursday, August 17, 2006

# 176 (cont'd) PANDORA'S BOX IV

The Prosecution of Violators

So now the nest is gone. And as I reflect, I have to admit it was the largest bee’s nest I have ever seen. Beautiful and wondrous, like the exotic beauty of a Pandora’s box. And now that the pain of violation has weakened slightly, I feel that it IS a shame that the hornet’s nest was destroyed. Particularly after Hub told me about the architectural complexity of the honeycombs inside. It is a bloody shame. It is a shame that violation stirs such a need to fight back. That it stirs something so deeply emotional that it cannot heal without drastic recourse.

When one suffers physical pain, our first thought is to find healing through either a medical fix or monetary compensation. But when one suffers the pain of violation, I have realized that with that first flood of understanding, with that recognition of how deep it wounds, we are truly shocked. So shocked that we realize that there can’t be, and won’t be, a quick fix. And that, oddly enough, turns our thinking completely inside-out. Instead of drowning in self-pity we are motivated by the pain of violation to ensure this thing we have endured will never happen to anyone else.

So with Hub’s help, we have done that. You can now walk with security near my war-mongering pink petunia and loll in the shade of my Mayday tree.

And as for the shopping mall, and the incident with the doorsill, where I found myself flat on my face on the concrete, the property owners would admit no wrong-doing. But when I signed off the papers that said I would release them from any responsibility as long as it NEVER happened again, I now see that it will never happen again. The doorsill remains but it is now well-marked with reflective tape and even white posts and the side-door has a bright flood light overhead. That too, will never happen again.

Now I didn’t know where I was going when I started writing this but I am surprised where I have come. I have come to a realization that when we are physically hurt we want to fight back. To give back to the perpetrator as good or better than we got. But when it is that deeper, more painful, chronic and ongoing emotional pain, we back away from self-pity. When violated, we seek comfort with a recourse that will protect others from the same fate. And suddenly our concern for others is greater than our concern for self.

Returning to the story of “Pandora’s Box,” if you remember, there was one kindly creature that was left behind, trapped in the box. It long begged to be released before Pandora would risk releasing it. But that last was an entity that understood violation and so, when finally released, it showed a greater concern to heal and protect others than to heal itself.

1 Comments:

Blogger Roberta said...

I just realized I probably should have told you that besides the initial pain and a bit of itching, I had no grand allergic reaction to the hornet stings.

so..you can comment -- I'm still here and I'd love to hear from you.

1:03 PM  

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