Wednesday, May 24, 2006

# 152 EGAD! PICTURES OF NAKED MEN

A couple of posts back I outlined a New Meme and issued a silly challenge. The challenge being that I would write a blog about the most common search phrase on other’s blogs. (you know, just to keep traffic moving). And I said I would do this even if the search phrase was as ridiculous as ‘cats and salamandars’. But it’s so much worse then that – the phrase I am stuck with, the post that I must write to live up to that which I promised, is – “pictures of naked men!”

What do I know about pictures of naked men? I certainly didn’t know anything about such pictures when I was a kid. Modesty was my Mother’s middle name and she censored anything on paper that came in the door. I think she even maintained an ongoing suspicion about the ‘Free Press’ although you and I know there was no risk of pictures of naked men in that paper.

And, as kids, we couldn’t even use the catalogue as an oblique point of reference when it came to almost-naked men. My Mother eliminated that risk by tearing out all the pages of men’s underwear before we were allowed to look at it. So you can’t blame me if I gazed long and hard at the first picture I saw of a naked man in a book at school. A picture of statue, a Greek God no doubt, with no clothes on.

I thought it was an ugly business and decided then and there that the rule for exposure should be a Unisex rule. (Of course the term ‘Unisex’ had not yet been coined, but I use it here for the sake of brevity). I think most men, young or old, prefer women to follow the rule of mystery through modest cover-up. Women dictate women’s fashions, but I think, if the truth be known, men probably prefer to see a woman dressed in an elegant flowing gown with one shoulder bared or a bit of cleavage and the rest left to imagination. I’m not sure they appreciate bare midriffs. Or rear saddlebags exposed by ladies who artfully carve out the rear-end of a pair of shorts. Or even, over exposure of other parts of the body.

And similarly, this is how I prefer to see men depicted in real life. Fully clothed with sleeves rolled up and just a sexy bit of bicep or chest-hair showing (if they haven’t exfoliated it), and the rest left to my imagination.

12 Comments:

Blogger PEA said...

I'm with you there...I prefer men to be "mostly" covered up with a button or two undone to show chest hair. Then I let my imagination run wild! hehe

2:15 PM  
Blogger Julie Oakley said...

Oh what a funny delightful start to my morning to find that you'd been compelled to write about 'pictures of naked men'. It'll be interesting to see whether you get a whole bunch of new visitors to your site!

3:52 AM  
Blogger Roberta said...

pea, sadly I think this sort of thing will soon be extinct. And the sight of bald-headed men is headed down the same road. Look now before it is all gone. Seems we are rapidly plunging into a new order where all efforts are concentrating on men having hairless chests and bushy heads (mo matter what age the men are).

julie oakley, you may well laugh since you were the instigator. No big rush of new visitors yet, but it might take a bit of time. Glad you enjoyed my efforts.

9:37 AM  
Blogger Eleanor said...

Add me to the list of those who prefer clothed and a sense of mystery, over right there in your face.

I was once persuaded to go and see the Chippendale dancers with a bunch of workmates. Eeuuww. Easily one of the worst experiences of my life. Oiled bodies gyrating under my nose, while surrounded by frenzied, baying women just wasn't my idea of a good time at all. I'm not a huge prude, not at all, but the whole thing just made me feel really ill. Probably the baying women more so than the dancers, actually.

10:30 AM  
Blogger goldenlucyd said...

I'm with you. What's happened to mystery? Great post, Roberta!

2:44 PM  
Blogger Roberta said...

Eleanor, thanks for commenting. I hate to admit it, but I also saw one of those Chip & D performances. When one gyrated too close to my face I couldn't help commenting. "Oh, buzz off. That is no different then the bacon nowadays. Once you fry the water out of it there's nothing left but a microscopic bit of frizzle!"

Glad you enjoyed the post, goldenlucyd! We may not be in the midst of the action, but we still know what we like! (chuckling).

7:53 PM  
Blogger Julie Oakley said...

Oh my - I was once invited to go to a Chippendale evening and firmly said NO. I'm not a prude either but I can't think of anything more ghastly and embarrassing (it's that having to bay and look as if you can't get enough of it to make the dancer's efforts look worthwhile which embarrasses me) I think the only way I could endure such a mortifying experience would be to start out the evening extremely drunk - not something I want to do!

3:16 PM  
Blogger Roberta said...

julie oakley, guess you have a more forward-looking mind than some of the rest of us. We had to go just to see how disgusting it really was. Having discovered that then we had to go home and ponder for weeks and days and years why such crap draws a crowd of clients that include housewifes, mothers, professionals, and even 'dead sober' participants.

12:21 PM  
Blogger the old bag said...

half-clothed (means it's summer!) and confident

:-]

7:08 AM  
Blogger Roberta said...

Hi the old bag, you silly old thing, you make me laugh. Thanks for commenting. ;D :D
Did you find your bike?

8:29 AM  
Blogger Joel said...

Mine is "camel toes" -- what's up with your newsfeed?

3:26 PM  
Blogger Roberta said...

Hi joel, that's a search line even worst than 'pictures of naked men', at least in the context of modern slang. But, having said that, I do have a keen interest in camels that has to do with their unique nature, personality, and training. And I do plan to write something about that very soon. But missing from the discussion will be anything relative to 'camel toes' in the biological sense or even the new slang sense.

10:29 PM  

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