Saturday, July 15, 2006

# 164 NO KNIGHTING, but what about SAINTHOOD?

You know the letter I wrote on (see #159, June 15th entry) to the Queen requesting Knighthood for Bobby. It’s not going to happen. My request has been refused. I am much pained by the turn of events, but when I am in pursuit of something, I don’t quit until I’ve exhausted all efforts. There is yet one other honor that might be equal to, or greater than, that of Knighthood. So this week I wrote yet another letter.

TO HIS HOLINESS POPE BENEDICT XVI,

Most Holy Father, I wish to make a request for Sainthood of someone to represent the protection and blessing of the Common Man - He who has done much of worth, but nothing of notice.

Most Holy Father, I understand that the criteria is proof of three miracles and there are three that are undeniable miracles.
The first Miracle is that this man has put up with me all these years.
The Second Miracle is that he has survived all the turmoil.
And the third Miracle (this one pending) is if you would grant my husband, Bobby Smith, the special blessing of Sainthood, particularly since the Queen has refused him Knighthood, that would indeed be a Miracle.

And Most Holy Father, I am also given to understand that yet another criteria is that the body of would-be-Saints, when exhumed, show little or no decomposition after two years. This criterion also holds true. Bobby has been on the couch for two years watching Lone Star and there is no trace of decomposition of any part of his body.

So, Most Holy Father, for these reasons, I entreat you to let Sainthood for one, specifically Bobby Smith, proceed assuming that you find worthiness in what I have told you.

With All Sincerity,
Roberta Smith.

So now I must ask my readers, If this request is also refused, where do I go from here??

5 Comments:

Blogger PEA said...

LOL love it! Hmmm if that doesn't work out....is there such a thing as a BEST COUCH POTATO award??? lol

8:23 AM  
Blogger goldenlucyd said...

Roberta Dear,
Thanks so much for your sweet comment. My hands aren't working very well but I can still read and really enjoyed your last posts.
Re you letter to the Pope (very clever!) I wonder if an endorsement by an ancient Jewish grandmother would help? I'm availabe.

3:04 PM  
Blogger Roberta said...

Great thought pea, but I'm not sure where to forward my request.

So pleased you stopped by goldenlucyd. If the response to this request is more positive and I need a little extra support, I'll keep your kind offer in mind. Maybe Jewish grandmother's pull more weight in such serious matters, than you or I ever suspected.

1:12 AM  
Anonymous Esther said...

Dear Roberta,
If the Pope and the Queen can't see the merits of this man, then maybe....you have to go "THE MAN", the big "G" to ask for some kind of special annointment, awakening or calling. Ghandi saved India, Martin Luther King worked for civil rights, and Simon Peter was just minding his own business on the road to Damascus when he got the calling. In this case, however be careful what you pray for...

9:52 AM  
Blogger Roberta said...

esther, you make me chuckle. Guess I could go there but I might have to write a rather exaggerated Résumé.

12:08 PM  

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